Humor Dept.

Page 3

Exercise

Work out with a potato sack This is for older people. Younger people try it at their own risk. This is working well for me.

 
For those of us getting along in years, here is a little secret for building your arm and shoulder muscles. You might want to adopt this
 
Three days a week. Begin by standing straight, with a 5-LB. potato sack in each hand. Extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can-try to reach a full minute. Relax.
 
After a few weeks, move up to 10-LB. potato sacks, and then 50-LB. potato sacks, and eventually try to get to where you can lift a 100-LB. potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight out for more than a full minute.
 
After you feel confident at that level, start putting a couple of potatoes in the bags.
BODY MEETING :

All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge.
"I should be in charge," said the brain, "because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen".

"I should be in charge," said the blood, "because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you'd all waste away."
"I should be in charge," said the stomach," because I process food and give all of you energy."
"I should be in charge," said the legs, "because I carry the body wherever it needs to go."
"I should be in charge," said the eyes, "because I allow the body to see where it goes."
"I should be in charge," said the rectum, "Because I'm responsible for waste removal."
All the other body parts laughed at the rectum and insulted him, so in a huff, he shut down tight.
Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery, and the blood was toxic.
They all decided that the rectum should be the boss.

The Moral of the story?

The asshole is usually in charge !!

Local FBI warning In  Yoder, KS !

The FBI has issued a warning in  Reno  County.  They suspect a terrorist may be hiding among the Amish community.

This photo provided the first clue that triggered the investigation:
 
 

Dear Folks,
Just  a short note to let you know that our trip length to Brunswick GA to get away from "Ivan the Terrible" was made a lot shorter drive with the help of Florida.
Love J & J

Dear Folks,

This was sent to us to check out the stress level after the hurricanes .Love J & J

 

Read First:
I'm not sure exactly how it works, but this is amazingly accurate.
Read the full description before looking at the picture.

The attached photo has 2 identical dolphins in it.
It was used in a case study on stress level at St. Mary's Hospital.

Look at both dolphins jumping out of the water. The dolphins are identical.

A closely monitored, scientific study of a group revealed that in spite of the fact that the dolphins are identical, a person under stress would find differences in the two dolphins.

If there are many differences found between both dolphins, it means that the person is experiencing a
great amount of stress.

Look at the photograph and if you find more than one
or two differences you may want to take a vacation.